Half-Way Done and Feeling Nervous

HALF WAY DONE!!! (and still no idea what I'll be doing with the 4th of the 10th)

Song of the week: "Summertime Sadness" by Lana Del Ray: My new favorite song on the radio. It's a perfect song as summer fades into fall and have one last fling before it ends.

Run of the Week: Petersburg National Battlefield. Yes, I know I had this one a while back, but I finally found the time to circumnavigate the trails marked yellow on the map. Its about a 6.6 mile loop from the parking lot and if you go far enough out, you end up on a little used, sometimes overgrown, single track trail for about a mile and a half. It cuts across the battlefield along a ridge with a very nice view and works its way around to some places of interest. Overall, it was totally worth it and I will be running it again as the leaves start to change colors.

Currently Reading: Moving Mountains by Lt. General (Ret.) William G. Pagonis. Its a really fascinating read on his life and career as one of the Army's best logisticians ever. I find it very easy to read and follow. I would recommend it to anyone wanting to learn more about the logistics side of the Army.

Weeks 7 and 8 of QM BOLC have just flown by. I learned a lot to do with logistical operations and other functions that a Quartermaster can have. Despite the fact that we had three tests in four days and a memo due, I am finally starting to like what I am learning and I feel like I understand the concepts.

Week 7 was all about property management and how important it is to the Military. I went from being completely confused about this topic in ROTC (I was assigned to teach it to the others in my class) to I now have a solid basic foundation on which I can build off of for the rest of my career. It did help that the instructor was very engaging and always brought back his points to a real world experience of his own or someone he knew.

Week 8 covered two, albeit brief but important, subjects. Mortuary Affairs and Areal Delivery & Field Services. I learned that while there is a lot that goes into each of these subjects, a basic knowledge of each and some common scene can go a long ways in these two areas. We also started in on Petroleum and Water Operations, which we will be covering for the next two weeks.

More Later.

QM BOLC week 6 and Arlington National Cemetery

What a week! Not only did I visit arguably the most sacred place in the U.S. but I also got to celebrate with my 24th birthday with a group of new friends. I have to say this week was probably the best one yet here. And to top it all off, I got out and went mountain biking. There are some other things I am going  to talk about as well, but we'll go through the routine stuff first.

Song of the Week: "Don't You Worry Child" by Swedish House Mafia feat. John Martin. For some reason, every time I hear this song, I hear something new, a whole new reason to love this song again. My only regret is that I never got the chance to see it performed live.

Virginia So Far: Well I guess this is what you would call the wet season, it seems to rain every day now. (Is this fall?) I got out in one of the state parks this weekend and went mountain biking. It is a whole different experience here, not too fast and really technical. I had some problems riding over the roots and with the muddy corners, but the biggest problem I had was that because it was so technical, even on the downhills, you couldn't maintain enough speed to get up the next hill. I guess It presents a new challenge to conquer.

Week 6 of QM BOLC is all for Tactical Logistics. It's a very interesting subject once you get the hang of it, but its hard to learn in groups because everyone visualizes a different way and this became apparent during the practical exercise. Overall, its not a bad week and its a topic that I want to learn more about.

Some other stuff that happened this week: The general consensus is that I will be deploying in November (see here). I am just waiting on the official word. Nervous? Excited? I really don't know, its about half way in between. I also decided I'm not physically or mentally ready to go back to full time running and training. I tried it for about 2 weeks and its just not time yet.

The highlight of the week was the class trip to Arlington National Cemetery on Friday. We were only there for a short time and I only got to see a tiny bit of the place, but it was very humbling to visit. I did get to see a changing of the guard, but not a wreath laying ceremony. I will be making plans to back on a later date for the whole day.

QM BOLC Weeks 4 & 5

I can't believe its been five weeks since I showed up to Fort Lee, its gone by really fast. Or I should say its gone by really fast for the most part. While the days go by quick, its the time in class that is killing me. It is really death by Power Point. It gets even worse when you see the total number of slides in each presentation. Anyway more details below, but first...

Song of the Week: "Memories" by David Guetta feat. Kid Cudi. Honestly it is a dance number and a song that can get your blood pumping, but to me its about 'chilling out', relaxing, and "letting it all go for the night".

Virginia So Far: The weather is starting to cool off, instead of being in the 90's it is now in the 80's and 70's. Much better for running and outdoor activities. The humidity is also dropping. It all seems to be going well and I am differently joying my time here now.

After finishing tactics during week three, we moved back into the classroom environment. All its been since then is Power Point. We have covered topics from Army Writing, Communication Skills, and How to Build and Effective Presentation (yes that was by Power Point) to Cultural Awareness and, most recently, Subsistence, which we have a test on Monday morning at 0600. I really don't know what else to put down because I have been taking it really easy and staying on post a lot. We are going to D.C. next Friday on a class trip, I will take photos and post some.

QM BOLC Weeks 2 & 3

I know I am a little behind on posting so I going to try and knock out a few posts in the next few days and get you all back up to date.

Running: I happens when I want it to. (Not really upset or having problems with it, just really taking it easy and running how I feel. Its all good.)

Song of the week: "Ocean Avenue" by Yellow Card. An old song, but still a favorite. It always reminds me to have fun and take some risks. Most of all it reminds me to enjoy life one day at at time.

Virginia So Far: Well the weather has cooled off a bit and the humidity has dropped. I kind of like it here now. I am now settling into a somewhat normal routine, so its getting better.

Weeks 2&3 of QM BOLC are tactics weeks. Hold on now, if you are thinking its something like LDAC tactics you are completely wrong. They are not even remotely close. If I had to compare them books, the same author would have written them, but they would be from a different series. I'll go over in more detail down below, but most of my time was spent sitting around waiting to shoot or looking at power points. FUN.

The first week of tactics was convoy operations, range safety and basic small unit tactics. I did learn some stuff and I am glad I have the power point presentations to relearn from. We also spent some time on a simulator, which really didn't work on. I think we'll get more time with the simulator later on and it might work then. Friday morning (read 0200 on) was spent doing land navigation with a partner. We had 5 hours to find 10 points. It wasn't hard, there was just a lot of water everywhere making it one wet experience.

The second week was spent on the range qualifying on the M4. It took me a while to zero and get comfortable on my weapon. But once I got going, I was locked in. We also did some barricade shooting and some SRM. There was a lot of standing around as we could only have about a 5th of the class firing at one time. Overall, after being told that tactics would be the best 2 weeks of BOLC, I am now kind of worried for the rest of the course.

Much better that the first one.

I'll let you all know how the next few weeks in the class room are here soon.

QM BOLC Week 1

Before we get started on the past two weeks, we'll start with the normal stuff.

Song of the Week: "Crazy Kids" by Ke$ha feat. Will.i.am. A song about living life on the edge and having fun. It's quite a fun song.

Run of the Week: Petersburg National Battlefield. Very nice trail system close to where I'm staying. It's a mix of paved and packed dirt trials and its all in the shade.  The trials work their way through the park and provide a great way to see some history along the way.

So two weeks ago, I drove all the way from Missoula, MT to Petersburg, VA to attend QM BOLC-B at Ft. Lee, VA. It was quite the drive not including the fact that my air conditioning went out somewhere in Ohio. I got to see a lot of the country I would have never seen and drove some roads that were very worth it. One of the highlights of the trip was driving the Midland Trial, aka US Highway 60, from Charleston, WV to Lewisburg, WV. It is a very curvy road that works it way up and down a few of the Appalachian  mountains. It goes through a state park and is very beautiful the whole way. After that, I took some of the back roads (mainly the Glascow road) in Virginia. I got lost and went down a service road of a golf course  (oops) but it all worked out in the end.

I took a few stops along the way, but by far the most interesting one was Appomattox. The thing that stood out to me the most was how the battle and the surrender of General Lee was portrayed. History text book put a very Northern spin on it, so I felt there was a very Southern spin at the battlefield. But hey, history only remembers the winners.

A bridge over a stream at Appomattox. Notice the design of the sides.

I just completed the first week of QM BOLC-B. To put it lightly, it was really boring. We did a lot of paper work, took a PT test and did some health screenings. I can't wait to do more this next week. I'm not quite used to having nights and weekends off during training yet, but I will get used to it. I have adapted to the weather quite well and am starting to enjoy it. That's all I have for now.

Going, Going, Gone.

I'm posting early this week because I don't know If I'll have time the in the next week, most likely not in the next two week. I'll be real busy driving and getting settled in at BOLC. I am starting my road trip in two days and really excited to get going. Before I start though, I am running the Missoula 1/2 Marathon tomorrow. I'm not racing it, I'm just running it to run. It took me a while to come to this decision and I have been waffling back and forth all summer. It started out as I was going train hard and race it for a PR and the win, but as the summer wore on I realized I was burnt out from college. Then I was debating if I even wanted to run it or not. I finally decided I was just going to go out and try to have fun while running it. We'll see how it goes and I'll update the post. Link to tomorrows results here.

Update: I ran a 1:19:26, or an average of 6:01 min/mile. Good enough for 14th place overall.

Photo from my first post college race.

Starting Monday morning, I will be driving across the country, headed to BOLC. I'll be driving all week, although some days won't be very far. A lot of the trip has been planned out and I'll be meeting up with a few friends on the way. I will also be visiting a few museums and, battlefields, and other places on my bucket list of places to go. I'm going to try and take a lot of pictures along the way and post them to my Photostream. I also may add a page later about the trip.

Song of the week: "For the First Time" by The Script. What else can I say, its about rediscovering yourself and those you love. I have been doing a lot of self discovery since graduation and I'm about to embark on a lot more.

Run of the Week(end): The Missoula Marathon and 1/2 Marathon. If you ever get the chance or have the desire, come out to beautiful Western Montana and run it. It was name the top Marathon in the US by Runners World in 2010 and is a really well done event.

If your wondering about the layout change, I had to switch it up because the other template would not save as desired. It may change again.

Leaving Paradise

I don't know what to say other than I am leaving my little corner of paradise and I don't know when I'll be back to visit. It's going to be hard to go, harder than it was during college. At least during college I knew when I had time off and I could come home. I knew I would be able to see it in the winter in its perpetual whiteness and the spikes of green from the pines poking through. On these nights, I would look up at the cold, crisp sky and count the stars and the moon. If I was really lucky, I could catch a glimpse of the Northern Lights.

While winter was nice, it was nothing compared to summer when Western Montana is in its full glory. An abundance of sunshine and blue sky to go with a million places to go and explore. From hiking a new mountain to floating down a river, this place has it all, and I sure will miss it.

My corner of paradise

You see this paradise is going to be hard to compete with, sitting a stones throw from a base of two mountains and if I was any closer, in a river, is hard to find anywhere else. I can enjoy nature at its finest with out even having to leave my back porch.

I know every place is what you make of it, but it will be hard not to compare. I hope to find another little corner of this world that I can call paradise, but this one will always call me back. Because it has captured my heart, this is the place I will always call home.

Song of the week: "Rebel Beat" by the Goo Goo Dolls. I have always liked the Goo Goo Dolls ever since I first heard the song "Better Days" and as I grew to explore their music more and more, I was slightly disappointed that they hadn't come out with new music in a while. But last summer they came out with a new album and this is the song that has stuck with me since then.

Run of the Week: Northern Pacific Railroad grade. From Lookout Pass down to Taft, MT is 9 miles of very smooth trail. It would be an easy run to complete and offer a great experience. From a tunnel to scenic views, this trail offers it all. To top it all off, if you can have someone drop you off and pick you up, its all downhill on a genital grade. Also see my page on the Route of the Olympian for more detail.

The tunnel, about 4 miles down from Lookout Pass.

Update: To the post Heat Wave, I finally got all my paperwork in order to be able to travel. It took a bit and talking to quite a few people, but its done and now I just need to pick it up on my way across the country.

Heat Wave

News first: I finally got a new laptop. It took a bit as the first one I ordered got lost in shipping. I have a Lenovo S400 touch screen running Windows 8. I have to say I like it a lot and Windows 8 is great with a touch screen.

An Update: To the post Nervous Energy: I am now 50/50 on if I am deploying or not. I am going to wait a bit and talk to a few people I know and see what they have to say. I also plan on talking to my TAC at BOLC and getting in contact with the 4/10 S1 at a later date. Don't worry, I'm still really excited about just being on Active Duty in general.

Song of the week: Since I've been slacking off on the past few posts here is my new pick; "Letting Go" by Lupe Fiasco featuring Sarah Green. Its from one of my favorite all time albums called "Lasers". This song is about change for me, since I'll be experiencing a lot of that here soon. Have a listen.

Run of the Week: Downtown Missoula. If you don't mind a little stop and go running you can have quite the interesting run on the Sidewalks of downtown. I remember doing this in high school and no one seemed to care or get mad. Just follow the rules. Missoula is a really runner-friendly city and I can think of at least four races that they close down a portion of downtown Missoula for sometime during the year. I'm going to miss it.

Sorry, Its not of downtown. Enjoy the view of the M from the Madison street Bridge.

First off, I can't believe its July already. My new adventure starts in 2 weeks. I guess I better get on the push-ups and sit-ups. Everything has been coming in hot and fast since last Thursday. Emails, letters, and the such. I was really excited to get an email from my TAC about BOLC and that has set in motion the events of the next few weeks, I'll be rounding up paper work, uniforms, and everything else I'll need. Speaking of heat,  It has been hot out here in Missoula, record temps for this time of year, and I'm not use to it (yet). I guess having AC for the past 4 years spoiled me in to forgetting what a house with no AC is like. Give me a couple of days and I'll be good. Now for Virginia and then Louisiana, I think i might be in trouble. (Adapt and overcome!) Now to get that paper work....

The last post, I really had to get that off my chest. Its hard to talk to anyone about it because we all don't have  similar experiences with running. For example, my mom only views a burn out from running as an injury and it could never be mental. Former teammates are hard to get a hold of and there are a grand total of 4 that I ran with that graduated while I was there. I decided the best way was to write about it. I have decided not to force the issue of running and let running come to me. To say, I will run what I want, when I want (the one exception being PT runs). I will train and compete again, but I can't say when. Maybe when I start the new chapter in my life.

I think everything is starting to look up and I am getting really excited to go. It has put me in a much better mood and I really don't care about much else right now. While the past can shape us, and we can plan the future, we can only live in the here and now. You have to take advantage of the opportunities that come your way. I plan on doing so to the fullest extent. 

Somethings come off in the rain, others do not

I was going to originally post something along these lines last week, but some how the post ended up deleting itself.  This was also originally about a run I had in the rain recently, but I am now coming to a stark realization about my running in general.

The intent of this post is to provide a feeling of the break-neck highs and lows I have been experiencing since the the end of college. Its a vicious cycle and one I hope to escape soon.  Both events depicted are real and although they were the ones I wrote about, there are many more like them. It's a daily battle and this is just part of the story. The rest has yet to be written.

Last week I was out on one of my daily training runs, expect I can't really call them training runs anymore. What am I training for? I don't know, I guess to stay in shape.  Yeah,  we'll call it that...

So anyhow,  I was out on one of my runs last week. It was a planned eleven miler on the roads through town, a loop starting and ending at the local dirt track. All was going quite well and according to my Garmin Forerunner 210 right on an average pace of 6:20 per mile. Right on target.

I had just finished coming off the hilly section of my run at mile five and started to work my way back down to the flats of the valley floor to finish up my run. The next mile and a half went smooth if not fast according to my watch. Just as I turned to descend the last gradual hill to the valley floor it began to drizzle.  By mile seven it had turned into an all out downpour.

As my watch beeped at my, clambering for my attention to tell me my most recent split and that I had four  miles left, I faced a decision to make. Continue on, or take an impending right turn back to my car and cut my run three miles short.  Something inside of me kept me from taking that right turn and guided me straight and then to the left, continuing along my intended route.

My watch beeped one final time to inform me that I had finished my run, all eleven miles, I slowed to a walk. I was soaked from head to toe and cold. As I stripped off my long sleeve shirt that was clinging to my body I realized something else,  I felt happy. It was the happy feeling along the lines of completing something that you normally wouldn't do on your own, and it felt great.  You see, I am not one to usually run in the rain and would only do so if there was no other option.  But this time there was another option and I kept going.

I stood there, on the track,  letting the rain, which had now receded to a drizzle again,  bounce off my chest and back contemplating my running. Was this finally the run that signified that I was moving on from being a college athlete? Was I finally moving on from the self imposed pressure cooker of trying to stay on top? Had the rain really washed away the feeling that you are always one step behind the competition?  Had all this happen in one run? Regretfully, it had not. The dirt on my skin from college running is going to take a lot more than one run in the rain to remove it. 

I recently had a conversation with an older friend and he asked how my running was going. As we talked, he reminded me that I need to get back to the root of my running and that I wasn't in college anymore. I needed to re-find why I love running.  I need to start removing the layers of dirt from my skin.  The first step is to take the pressure off myself.  I need to relax and enjoy every run. Don't worry about pace, run how you feel at that moment. 

I am starting to realized this will be  long journey to self recovery,  not the short path I had been hoping for.  I don't know where this path may take me, but I want to, no need to, follow it. I believe a change of scenery will do me a lot of good.  Get away from the two running communities I know,  and give me a chance at re-inventing my self and my running. I will stay in contact with my past and all the friends I made, but the future beckons and awaits with open arms. Open arms to embrace a new me and a new relationship with running.

I have to give this a try. I have to do this in order to save running.  In order to save all the good friends an memories I made. I have to do this in order to save myself.

Internal Fire

I spent yesterday evening reading a book I came across. It was a good book, but that's not the important thing  to take away here. I w ant to highlight a brief section, maybe only half a page, where the Great Aunt is explaining her passion for saving old homes. She describes it as her fire and when asked what that means, she says its what drives your life and that it can take many forms. This got me thinking as I lay in my bed later that night 'Whats my fire?'. As I lay there, the thought came to me that a fire has many different colors that burn hotter that the previous color.

The question and the though sat there in my mind for a bit before it hit me that since there are many layers to a fire that there could be many things that drive you that change over time as you start to zero in on your passion, or burn hotter. I started to think on this and analyzed what has driven me in the past few years and I came up with three layers of my fire so far.

The red outer layer of the flame was my drive to run in college and get an engineering degree. It drove me to attend SDSM&T and run cross country and track. I threw myself head long into running and academics the summer before I started college and this passion burned the brightest for the next 3 years. It took me places I could only imagine a few years earlier, and taught me many things.

After three years, the red glow started to get replaced by an orange one that had taken root about halfway through my Freshman year. I'm calling this one the desire to serve my country.  I started feeding this fire by joining ROTC. I really stoked the flames when I received my commission earlier this year.  I have no regrets about the decision and this flame still burns bright and hot, but it has been joined by another one even hotter.

Recently, poking its way trough the orange has been yellow, or leadership and servitude as I think of it. It it a hungry flame and there were a couple of false starts along the way, but the hunger is what drove me to be the type of leader I am. I want to know how to do everything the right way so I can lead by example and show others what is right. This yellow  flame had been smoldering in the background for quite a few years and I have always craved positions of leadership. But until this flame made its way to the top, I didn't know the true meaning of leadership, but now this yellow flame drives me to be better so I can help those around me.

All these colors still burn and drive me today and help shape who I am and what I do and I wouldn't have it any other way. The red flame still burns because I want to get a masters degree. The orange flame is burning as bright as ever now that I am starting my military career. And I hope the yellow flame never dies. I can't wait to see where they take me and what the next layer of my flame brings.

If your wondering, the book I read was "Saving CeeCee Honeycutt" by Beth Hoffman. Don't judge, I read thrillers too.

Nervous Energy

O.K. I'm 99% sure I will be deploying to Afghanistan this winter, probably sometime in mid-November when I show up at Ft. Polk. How do I know this you ask? Well, my first duty assignment is with the 4th Brigade, 10th Mountain Division, and they just got deployed to Afghanistan this past week. I would say, right now, I feel like a nervous ball of energy and excitement. I know some people stay at the rear (in the United States) during a deployment, but I am really hoping that that's not the case for me. I want to go.


I can't tell you that I know exactly why I want to deploy, but I want to. Maybe its for the experience, maybe its  because its what I agreed to do when I signed on to defend my country. I don't know. All I know is I hope I am on a quick flight out of Ft. Polk to Afghanistan.

Some of you might be saying "now, hold on, don't you want some experience with a platoon before you deploy? Don't you want to know how to do you job before you deploy?" All I can say is that  I hope QM BOLC will give me enough of a basic skill set that I can tackle my assigned duties head on like I would in any of my engineering classes. Just approach it with an open mind and be prepared to take notes and study outside of class. Or in this case take notes and crack open the FMs. Listen to other to, especially those you work with.

My journey will start in  about a month when I drive to Ft. Lee, VA to attend QM BOLC until early November. After that, I will be driving down to Ft. Polk and off to who know what. All I know is the 4th of the 10th will deployed when I show up and report in for my first duty assignment. So, to all the Patriot Brigade members who are currently deployed, best of wishes and stay safe. I hope to meet you down range.

Song of the Week: "Can't Hold Us" by Mackelmore and Ryan Lewis What else can I say, great song from a great artist, with a great message.

Run of the Week: Crazy Canyon If you don't mind a lot of hills, this is a great place. I went biking there last weekend and had a great time. After riding some of the loops, I followed the Crooked Trail (302) home.

The Office

Song of the Week: Imagine Dragons' "Radioactive" For some reason this song, in my mind, takes the group from just another indie band to main stream group that can put out multiple hits. Plus its a great song.

Run of the Week: The Kim Williams trail. It runs right through the heart of Missoula and along the Clark Fork River. Its what gets me out of bed some mornings to go run. I also ran down it because there was an apartment complex on fire across the river and I wanted to watch for a bit. 

Thought of the Week: "Where the f*** does time go?" Time is just flying by this summer. In a little over a month I will begin my trek across the Country and  on to a new phase of my life. Also my little bro turns 20 in less than a week. I guess he's not so little anymore.

Running is going OK, I'm not really motivated to train right now even though I have a race coming up. It really feels more like work now than play. Running should feel like playing, race days are the only days at the office. I guess my work only really consists of getting/staying in shape and I need something else to do. I feel like I am stuck at an office of a job that I couldn't do with out, but I rally want to throw in the towel.

Normal office hours are from about 9 am to 5 pm, with an hour or so for lunch around 1 pm. During time the office is open, my routine consists of a morning run, a mid day workout, and a mid afternoon run. These are the good days at the office. A lot of the days seem to be one run and and mid day workout.

Sometimes the office closes early or doesn't even open for the day due to personal injury or laziness. Usually, if that's the case there is a steady stream of people coming by to knock and see if it the office is open or if its opening late. Sometimes the Office is open real late. (See 7:30 pm - 9 pm bike rides) This causes it to open late the next morning.

I enjoy the job I do, but it's work. I really need to figure out how to get out of the Office and turn all this work into play. I only want to have to work once every couple of weeks when I race. The rest of it should be for fun. It should all be for fun.

Restart

Time to restart this blog, fresh.

I decided to remove all my old posts on here and start all over from scratch and see if I actually can write a blog that I update on a regular basis and isn't me bitching about college and running. (Well maybe a little about running). 

Song of the Week: Cut Copy's "Lights and Music". I heard this song for the first time in a while during a work out last week. It brought back a lot of memories and I forgot how awesome it was. Its been stuck in my head since then. (Watch it.)

Run of the Week: Rattlesnake National Recreation Area. I had been avoiding this place like the plague since I got back home, but I finally drove up to the trail head this past weekend and had an amazing run (like usual).

Though of the Week: What to do, What to do. I have no idea what to do every day now that I don't have the structure of academics behind me and I don't have anything planned until mid-July. Oh well, I guess I will just go and enjoy life in beautiful Missoula, MT.

About Me: I grew up in a small mountain town in Western Montana, called Missoula. Its the one place I will always call home. Went to college at South Dakota School of Mines in Rapid City, SD (go 'Rockers!) and graduated with a degree in Civil Engineering. While I was in college I ran track and cross country and was in ROTC. Upon graduation, I received my commission as an Officer in the Army. I am a part of the Quartermaster Corps, and I will be stationed out of Ft. Polk, LA beginning in mid-November. Running and outdoor activities have always been a big part of my life and occupy a lot of my time. I also enjoy cooking.

I am going to do my best to update this blog one a week as I travel around and begin my career.